flying free

Shadows.

There’s a sadness inside me that I’ve never known before. 

It shows up almost every night now, and I don’t know why.

Tonight was the worst yet. I just feel like I’m losing who I am, or who I used to be.

I loved who I used to be. Always laughing and smiling. Always optimistic. 

I don’t know where she went, but I want her back.

I just feel like I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know my pupose.

I was always one to dream big. Now I feel as if my dreams will never come true. 

I can feel the old me lurking in some deep corner of this new darkness telling me

everything will be alright. That I matter. That my dreams can and will come true.

But this darkness inside me shuts her up so quickly. 

I don’t know why. 

There are shadows in my heart that have replaced the beams of sunlight that were

my energy, my strength.

I don’t understand what’s happening to me. This isn’t me. This isn’t who I want to 

be. I’m lost in the dark. I don’t know how to find my way back. 

I don’t know what to do. 

I’m heart broken. 

And there’s no reason I should be. 

I have fallen into a nightmare.